To All the Adoption Haters–I Wish You Knew These Two Women

There are those who can’t imagine giving birth to a child and then allowing someone else to raise that child.

I want to introduce those people to Shayla*.

Shayla lost several of her toes to frostbite. While lost in a haze of chemicals swimming through her bloodstream, she laid down in an icy back alley and almost died.

Court-ordered rehab has not been successful. Instead, the demons Shayla fights, bestowed upon her by a chaotic childhood, have plagued her.

Twice, she cradled an infant and begged a family to care for the little child who came into the world battling in utero drug exposure.  Both sets of adoptive parents hugged Shayla. Both sets of adoptive parents love her, pray for her, and support her however they can.

I want to introduce those who don’t understand adoption to Trudy.

Trudy has three children and is suffering from a degenerative disease that makes holding her children difficult. She wants an open adoption where she can see her new baby but ensure the child isn’t neglected.

There are so many examples we could give you, but in the interest of privacy, please, know, our birth mothers love their children. Our adoptive parents are incredible individuals who willing accept challenging situations.

These women don’t easily say, “I want to give my baby away.” These women love their children. They are trying to find the very best situation for everyone.

*Names have been changed.

Posted in


  1. Tyshekia on June 10, 2021 at 4:44 pm

    I am a Birth mom in Maryland that is going through the adoption process, my PTSD made it really hard to handle my emotions and be a mom at the same time. I fought as hard as I could but could not give my baby girl the life she deserves and needs and her father is no help. I love everything about the open adoption process because of my trauma it is hard to trust people but my worker makes sure I know what’s going on with my baby girl and explains everything in a way that I can understand. It is not easy but when you love your child as much as I do , you put your feelings to the side and give your baby the best life possible through a different family. I always said I would break generational curses and this is a for sure way I know my baby girl will be well taken care of.

    • ViAnn Prestwich on June 14, 2021 at 6:45 pm

      I am so glad things are working well for you. Can I email you on your personal email and maybe we could talk. I’d love to have tell us what you’d like other birthmothers and adoptive parents to know.

Leave a Comment